A friend and I were having lunch and I was asking about her and her boyfriend. She said they were doing well, but suddenly got tongue-tied, saying that she wanted my advice on something. After slight prodding, she finally told me that she was having a bit of intimacy issues. It was about how he was touching her and, sometimes, she found it non-appealing. Obviously, my interest was piqued and I asked for an elaboration on what she meant. She said, “It is very difficult to describe… This is so embarrassing!… At times, his touches are very harsh and unromantic. It feels like I am his buddy, being padded on the back that kind. I do not like the lack of gentleness. This is very hard to put into words… Let me demonstrate what I mean…”

She then proceeded to grabbing my hand roughly, face down with her thumb on top of the back of my hand, then began rubbing at turbo speed, almost like she was trying to rub some dirt off the back of my hand. Next, she aimed for my shoulders for a “shoulder massage”. She grabbed on and began kneading quickly (and, I have to say, not so softly) like I was a tough piece of dough she needed to turn into bread right that second. After she sat back down, I was quite speechless for about a minute. Naturally, I was even more curious then, so we started a long talk about what she, and other women, liked regarding being touched. Our discussion led me to writing this post — a sort of quick guide for guys.

What Women Like

Gentle caresses show how much you treasure the delicate woman in your arms. Give her the attention she deserves and take your time each time you are with her and help her get warmed up. Lighten your touch even more to tease the senses and create more intense sensation later.

Slow stroking are simply sensual, giving time and attention to every part of the body. Anticipation increases the intensity of the intimacy, so going slow makes her crave more of your touch. Start at outer extremities, then work your way in. You may be surprised when she starts working your hand to kick it up a notch.

Innocent touches throughout the day build up the intimacy, so when you get time by yourselves it will be that much better. In public places, restaurants or while shopping, connect with your lady by reaching out and giving her arm a stroke or touching the small of her back. It is a reminder that you are there and you are happy to be with her. (Just don’t reach for inappropriate body parts. Instant turn off.)

Beyond Touches

Eye contact can communicate how you feel quickly. A loving look will make your woman feel loved and secure.

Whispering in her ears loving words or compliments makes them special because they are for her ears only. It is like you are sharing secrets together. Mystery and secrecy can be very sexy.

Little gestures can sometimes do more than any kind of touching to get to a lady’s heart (and maybe other places). It does not have to be expensive flowers and diamonds (although those should accelerate things). Even just a love note on a post-it is uber sweet and heart-melting.

Like It Rough?

I would like to say that I represent every woman’s opinion above, but of course everyone has their individual tastes. Guys, just pay super close attention to any reaction you get. I can guarantee that you will not regret it.

Those of you who have been reading this and thinking “I like it rough!”, all I have to say is: Fifty Shades, girl! I will admit that it is thrilling to be roughed up, but only once in a while please. And nothing too extreme! But that’s just me… (Guys, get consent before you do anything rough, including but not limited to spanking, biting or anything that involves props.)

{ Final Thought }
Ladies, what are your thoughts on this? If you are a man reading this, we need your expert insights too. Share!